Guidelines for Friends and Family of Converts

Scholarly research into religious movements has repeatedly pointed up the likely consequences of certain courses of action. Based on the findings of this research, INFORM has drawn up the following guidelines for people who are anxious about the involvement of a friend or relative in a religious movement:

1. Get as much accurate, balanced and up-to-date information as possible about the particular religious movement and the individual concerned.



2. Keep in touch. It is important that the convert maintains contact with the wider society so that he or she has access to a standpoint from which to assess the world-views and values presented by the movement.



3. Listen. Don't tell converts how wrong, sinister, dangerous or evil the movement is and how mistaken, stupid, duped or brainwashed they are. Try to understand how they perceive the situation. If you try to define their experience for them you risk pushing them into a defensive position that would prevent them from considering alternatives.



4. Try to show respect for the convert's right to choose.



5. Be there. And remember that converts are more likely to leave a movement if they do not feel that they will lose face by doing so.



6. In a supportive and non-confrontational manner explain to the participant what you believe might be the more troubling aspects and potential dangers associated with the movement. Encourage him/her to consider these seriously in the light of his/her own participation in, and experience of, the movement.



7. Discuss converts' new beliefs and values. Ask 'What if?' questions. For example, if converts agree that deceptive fundraising practices are wrong before they encounter them, they are more likely to disapprove if the movement asks them to participate in them at a later date.



8. If you have good grounds for believing there is actual or potential danger to a member of a new and/or alternative or spiritual religious movement and/or criminal activity, it is advisable to go to the appropriate authorities such as the police, social services or local British Embassy.



9. INFORM warns against the dangers of the illegal act of kidnapping or using forceful means to remove converts from a movement.



10. More details can be found in Eileen Barker's New Religious Movements, A Practical Introduction (at present being revised for a second edition).

INFORM is not an 'advice agency'. Our main aim is to help people through providing them with accurate, balanced information and through directing them towards other experts and professionals. If requested, we can, for example, put enquirers in touch with qualified, experienced counsellors.